Glasgow wins Commonwealth Games vote

Funny story written by Mark James

Friday, 9 November 2007

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Deep fried Mars bars will put an end to this

Glasgow may have won the right to host the 2014 Commonwealth Games but questions are already being asked about how the country, celebrated as the birthplace of economist Adam Smith, TV inventor John Logie Baird and heart disease, is going to fund the Games.

Scotland's second city beat off a spirited bid by the capital of Nigeria, Abuja, to win the vote 47 to 21.

However, sources close to the Scottish bid team have admitted that the money for the Games has yet to be put in place.

One insider told The Spoof that "we have been working on this bid for years but we had real trouble finding the money to be able to pull it off. Luckily, last Thursday, we received an email from a Mr John Ngobo. Mr Ngobo is the son of the former Finance Minister of Nigeria, Mr Nancy Ngobo. In his email, he explained how his father had fled Nigeria and that over $1.2 billion was left behind in his bank accounts. His father has since died. We have agreed to give Mr Ngobo £250,000 so that he can secure the release of that money and he has agreed that he will give us the money that we need to fund the Games. We sent the money to him in cash yesterday".

He went on, "we were all amazed that this man would help us in a bid against his native Nigeria but given what he told us happened to his dad, it is not surprising that he is willing to help. We are looking forward to receiving the money from Mr Ngobo in the next couple of days".

News of the bid win sparked street parties in Glasgow. News of the funding email sparked an equally large party in a small village in north west Nigeria.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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