Houston Astros Batboy To Put His Astros World Championship Series Ring Up On eBay

Written by Abel Rodriguez

Friday, 17 April 2020

image for Houston Astros Batboy To Put His Astros World Championship Series Ring Up On eBay
Astros batboy Hanky Franciosa can be seen just to the left of the dugout security guard.

HOUSTON – Sports Balls Illustrated said that they spoke with the father of the Houston Astros batboy.

Ersatz Franciosa told SBI that his 12-year-old son, Hanky, is so upset about the recent Astros Sign-Stealing Scandal, that he wants to sell his 2019 Astros World Championship Series ring.

His father asked him why, and he replied, “Because, like General Benjamin Franklin said 90 years ago, cheaters never prosper, unless, they’re really damn good cheaters.”

Mr. Franciosa said that his son will put the ring up on eBay, and that he’ll take $11,000 or the best offer.

Franciosa added that his son will also throw in an Astros deck of playing cards that shortstop Carlos Correa gave to him, and that contains seven aces.

Hanky remarked that he will also part with two packages of Astros Brand Chewing Tobacco, an Astros frisbee, and an 8 by 10 autographed glossy photo of Yvette Reinhold, Miss Astros of 2019.

Hanky Franciosa said that he plans to donate 25% of all the sales to the children of the Houston Astros cotton candy vendors.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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