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Funny story: Barcelona - Is This The End?

Barcelona - Is This The End?

"Everything must come to an end" is how another old saying goes, and it was never more appropriate than on Tuesday night at Anfield, as Barcelona, so long the dominant force in Eurpoean football, threw away a 3-0 advantage, and crumbled out of the Ch...

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Funny story: Barcelona Misery Total After Team Bus Was 'Up On Bricks'

Barcelona Misery Total After Team Bus Was 'Up On Bricks'

"It never rains but it pours", is the way the old saying goes, and it was never more true than on Tuesday night at Anfield, when the Barcelona football team, humiliated and dumped out of the Champions League by Liverpool, emerged from the stadium for...

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Funny story: Spurs Boss Pochettino To Take Up Barcelona Job

Spurs Boss Pochettino To Take Up Barcelona Job

Mauricio Pochettino, the Tottenham Hotspur coach, who has guided his team to their highest position on football's ladder for 140 years, has announced that he is to leave the club, and is Barcelona-bound. He will become a waiter in a top hotel.

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Funny story: Football Gossip: Mourinho Manhunt latest, Blatter, Tottenham and Messi

Football Gossip: Mourinho Manhunt latest, Blatter, Tottenham and Messi

Under fire Manchester United manager Jose Mourinho made his feelings clear when told that he has been charged over comments he made in Portuguese to a TV camera after his side's win over Newcastle on 6 October. After consulting a lip reader, the FA s...

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Funny story: Barçelona's Lionel Messi Leaves Fan In Tears

Barçelona's Lionel Messi Leaves Fan In Tears

Lionel Messi, the Barçelona and Argentina footballer, has been severely criticised this morning after leaving a fan in tears. The Argentine was in South Africa as part of the Barçelona squad who were there to play a match to commemorate 100 years...

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Funny story: Messi's Manchester Mess

Messi's Manchester Mess

Lionel Messi will escape any punishment for his childish outburst after his side were comprehensively beaten by Arab club Manchester City. The Argentinean whinger was visibly upset when the referee refused to award Barcelona a penalty or send a o...

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Funny story: Transfer Speculation Part Two

Transfer Speculation Part Two

Here at Back and to the Left news we have our fingers on the pulse of the transfer market and let us tell you it's not a cadaver. Many other news outlets will scream about "hot tips" and "near certainties" when in reality they overheard a bloke on th...

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Funny story: Transfer speculation Part one

Transfer speculation Part one

The transfer silly season is now in full swing with millions of pounds being thrown at players who barely know how play the offside trap and who think "man on" is a homophobic slur. In a effort to cut through the lies and deceit in these the most...

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Funny story: George Clooney and Madonna To Star In The Sexually Erotic Romantic-Spy Thriller, The Raging Hormones

George Clooney and Madonna To Star In The Sexually Erotic Romantic-Spy Thriller, The Raging Hormones

LOS ANGELES - Word flowing out of LaLaLand is that production on the romantic-spy thriller The Raging Hormones will begin within the week. George Clooney and Madonna will star in the Sheboygan Saddlewood epic which is based on a true story. Clo...

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Funny story: Martin Shuttlecock's Letters From Barcelona - Day Six - Usain Bolt And The Magic Fountains

Martin Shuttlecock's Letters From Barcelona - Day Six - Usain Bolt And The Magic Fountains

Barcelona - El Raval - Sunday: Another hot sunny Sunday in the Catalan capital. For the Shuttlecock clan, there was much to anticipate, for Sunday evenings are traditionally the best times to see the Magic Fountain on the olympic hill of Montjuic in all their spectacular glory. The whole clan were raring to go, and wallow in the Magic Fountain's musical lightshow. All that is, except Mart...

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Funny story: Martin Shuttlecock's Letters From Barcelona - Day Five

Martin Shuttlecock's Letters From Barcelona - Day Five

Barcelona - Day Five - L'Aquarium. In his own words for once. "It was a weird sort of a day; day five. It kicked off with the kids getting bored in the apartment, so I had a conspiratorial word in the son-in-law's shell, and we decided to take them out for a walk to burn off some of that excess energy. "I don't know if any of you who are reading this know Barcelona at all - if you do, you...

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Funny story: Martin Shuttlecock's Letters from Barcelona - Day Four - The Nou Camp

Martin Shuttlecock's Letters from Barcelona - Day Four - The Nou Camp

No trip to Barcelona is ever considered complete without a visit to the magnificent Nou Camp. Which is where Martin Shuttlecock went on Friday, accompanied by his football loving son in law. Who filmed the event for posterity, unknown to Shuttlecock. "He had one of them orbital cameras," Shuttlecock revealed. "What does films and that. I didn't know he was filming it. I thought he was just t...

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Funny story: Martin Shuttlecock's Letters From Barcelona - Day Three And El Raval

Martin Shuttlecock's Letters From Barcelona - Day Three And El Raval

Night time: Sagrada Familia, El Raval and Ladyboys - As regular readers are probably aware, Martin Shuttlecock can't write for peanuts, has no comprehension of the concept of humour, or irony, or even basic table manners. So we sent a Skoob News reporter out to interview him. In a cockroach infested crackhouse up an alley in Barcelona's notorious El Raval district. "It's not really all that...

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Funny story: Martin Shuttlecock's Letters From Barcelona - Day Two

Martin Shuttlecock's Letters From Barcelona - Day Two

Day two: Day two got lost somehow. So this is really day three part one. Day three part two will appear at some point today, providing day three isn't quite as hectic as day two. Deep joy on day two with the discovery of a shop that sells pies. Things were looking up. Then things looked up even more with the discovery of a chip shop that sells fish and chips, pies, mushy peas and gravy too!...

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Funny story: Martin Shuttlecock's Letters From Barcelona - Day One

Martin Shuttlecock's Letters From Barcelona - Day One

"Well, that wasn't at all what I expected," said a decidedly disgruntled Martin Shuttlecock, from his garret in Barcelona's notorious El Raval district, last night. "The flight down here was pretty uneventful - although it wasn't a Lear jet, it was at least a jet, one of them airbus things. Still, at least we never did a belly flop onto the M27. And we didn't get served champagne by a bevvy of...

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Funny story: Local Man To Post Daily 'Letter From Barcelona' Providing He Actually Gets There And Can Stay Sober For Long Enough

Local Man To Post Daily 'Letter From Barcelona' Providing He Actually Gets There And Can Stay Sober For Long Enough

Local man, Martin Shuttlecock today announced that he intends to post daily letters from Barcelona - on condition that he actually makes the trip, and can avoid getting blind drunk on Estrella Damm, absinthe, and local wine by the bucketload. "It'...

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Funny story: Local Man Brands Home Secretary, Theresa May, As: "A Brain-Dead Muppet"

Local Man Brands Home Secretary, Theresa May, As: "A Brain-Dead Muppet"

Speaking from his 1960's retro-themed council tower block in Titchfield, Hants this evening, local man, Martin Shuttlecock angrily declared that in his opinion, Home Secretary, Theresa May, is "a brain-dead muppet" with no tangible grip on reality, a...

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