Written by Monkey Woods

Tuesday, 18 September 2018

image for Conor McGregor Has Chips Every Night For His Tea
Yum yum, Bejesus!

Conor McGregor, the former UFC featherweight and lightweight champion has allegedly told members of a panel in an interview that he loves chips, and has them every night for his tea.

McGregor, 30, was appearing before the Mohegan Tribe Department of Athletic Regulation (MTDAR) (whatever that is) which had gathered to investigate the fighter's actions in attacking a referee at Bellator 187 (whatever that is!)

The Irishman apologised, and told the panel that he is constantly 'on edge', wound-up, and 'itching for a fight', possibly due to his carbohydrate-rich diet, which includes a nightly portion of chips. McGregor said:

"Me ma allus gives uss chips f'me tea - she sez the'll put hairs on me chest!"

Food experts say that "anything is fine in moderation", but chips every night for your tea seems a trifle excessive.

One man who totally understands McGregor, however, is English waster, Moys Kenwood, who knows a thing or two about chips. He said:

"I, like Mr McGregor, have lugs full of taties, and nothing better to do with them than to slice them up into chips. Fry, then sprinkle vinegar on them. As you can see, it's done neither of us any harm."

McGregor is scheduled to clash with Khabib Nurmagomedov at UFC229 on October 6. He is, as usual, supremely confident, and will, no doubt, step into the Octagon with a huge chip on his shoulder.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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