Protests grow in aftermath of Euro exit

Funny story written by Evil C

Wednesday, 29 June 2016

There was fury last night when it emerged that England's entire Euro 16 squad (with the exception of Jack Wilshere) have been refused Personal Independence Payment (PIP).

Manager Roy Hodgson resigned in disgust, with a close friend claiming, "Roy is furious.The government seem to think the boys were pretending to have such limited capability when in fact they gave it their all. Roy feels betrayed."

The ramifications are being felt beyond the world of football. A Labour shadow minister, who cannot be named because I don't know him, said angrily "This is so typical of this country under Tory rule. These boys served their country with pride despite their very limited ability and now the country turns its back on them as they return home wounded."

Online pressure is growing, with a petition "Give our boys their PIP" already attracting over a million signatures, forcing the government to officially do nothing.

Nigel Farage has warned that failure to reward these true British heroes could lead to violence, especially as there has been no confirmation that the Polish squad would be turned down for this essential benefit should they apply.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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