Danica Patrick's Nude NASCAR Calendar Is Flying Off The Book Store Shelves

Written by Abel Rodriguez

Friday, 10 January 2014

Hey!

The story you are trying to access may cause offense, may be in poor taste, or may contain subject matter of a graphic nature. This story was written as a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you wish to back out now, please click here to go back to the home page.

CHICAGO - The Amalgamated Data Gathering Agency has just informed the national press that NASCAR racing cutey Danica Patrick's brand new 2014 Nude NASCAR Calendar is a tremendous hit.

ADGA stated that the calendar is presently the fastest selling of any 2014 calendar including those of Kate Upton, Britney Spears, and even the South American firecracker Sofia Vergara.

Bagby B. Buckleybox, spokesperson with ADGA, told the news media that the ironic thing is that Danica wears a 34A bra, whereas Sofia wears a 32F bra.

Buckleybox did point out that what Miss Patrick lacks in the boobs department she makes up in the caboose department.

ADGA contacted Danica, who was shooting a commercial for Jose Cuervo Tequila in Hollywood and asked her how she felt about the great success of her 2014 calendar.

Danica replied that she was totally thrilled and because of the calendar she has been asked to appear on the next edition of Dancing With The Stars.

SIDENOTE: Danica has also been invited by President Obama and Vice-President Biden to attend a good old-fashioned White House barbecue in her honor (once the weather permits of course).

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Spoof news topics



Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more