COLUMBIA, South Carolina - The Gamecocks of South Carolina soundly defeated the Clemson Tigers 31-17.
The yearly meeting of the two teams is known as The Palmetto Bowl, so named after Guido Palmetto, who for 25 years was in charge of putting in the white yard markings at William Brice Stadium.
Guido Palmetto was such a dedicated fan of the Gamecocks that it is said that he wore his Gamecocks football helmet to bed each night.
Sports Bet Gazette reporter Zorro La Bamba spoke with Mrs. Palmetto and she smiled and nodded that it was true.
She hesitated for a moment and then added that she told Guido that she had to draw the line at the Gamecocks jock strap.
Clemson quarterback Connor Shaw told the assembled sports reporters after the game that the reason they lost the game was because he had a headache and the Tylenol he took did not work.
He also added that he hadn't eaten in 24 hours and when he asked his coach Dabo Sweeney if he could buy a hot dog during halftime the coach told him no.
SIDENOTE: Reports that a Gamecocks cheerleader intimately groped the Clemson mascot have proved to be false.
