AUSTIN - Danica Patrick was in Texas visiting an old boyfriend when she got the word that NASCAR had issued a statement that she will follow the NASCAR rules or else she will be subject to discipline including a fine and possible suspension.
Miss Patrick was shocked at the statement saying that she had not heard one word about it from any of the NASCAR officials.
According to Buckaroo Kazoo with The Turnstile Review Danica has been instructed to wear a brassiere at all times when she is on the racetrack, whether she is racing or just participating in racing festivities.
The statement was brought on by thousands of complaints from women and a few gay men who said that they did not appreciate Miss Patrick flaunting her tatas in front of grandmothers, grandkids, and a handful of immature male adults.
Danica informed Mr. Kazoo that she will be meeting with the official who put out the statement and ask him if the bra rules also applies to some of the male racers who have definite man boobs.
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