NASCAR's Danica Patrick Denies The Rehab Rumors

Written by Abel Rodriguez

Friday, 6 September 2013

TARZANA, California - The Queen of NASCAR, Danica Patrick was at The Gary Busey International Speedway filming a commercial for Cover Cutey Makeup.

After she had finished she met with Zorro La Bamba of The Sports Bet Gazette.

He asked her about the recent rumors that her love life has not been going as well as she would like.

Danica blushed. She then told La Bamba that he sure goes right to the intimate question right of the bat.

He apologized and told her that it was because he had to catch a plane to fly to Green Bay, Wisconsin to interview Green Bay Packers quarterback Aaron Rodgers.

She laughed and said she understood all about time constraints. She then told him that yes, it seems like lately when she isn't going around in circles on the racetrack she is going around in circles in her relationships.

La Bamba asked her if that meant that she had more than one love interest. The race car driver rolled her eyes and said that ever since her divorce she has realized that there are lots of guys out there and she is not at the point where she is ready to settle down again.

Ms. Patrick was asked about the rumors that because of the uncertainty in her love life that she has contemplated going into rehab.

She took a sip of her Diet Pepsi and replied that she'll admit that the thought has crossed her mind but she definitely does not want to end up like Lindsay Lohan or even Paris Hilton.

In Other News. Michelle Obama reportedly told one of the White House maids that she wishes her husband would back off of this Syria BS because the American peope voted for him to end wars and not to start them.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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