Bad Dreams: Heady Cubs' Fan Beheads a Goat

Funny story written by Ossurworld

Thursday, 11 April 2013

Chicago Cubs owner Tom Ricketts did not awake to find a goat's head in his bed.

No, the poor animal's head was delivered in a box to the Wrigley Field offices. This makes Wrigley Field the "Field of Nightmares."

As far as known, Don Vito Corleone is not a suspect. Neither is Al Capone, nor any public enemy in Chicago's legendary mob.

Because the curse of the Cubs has been centered on a goat, police likely will investigate the fan-base, a dedicated mob of miscreants who regard the famous field as a holy shrine, never to be desecrated by the likes of ownership and Theo Epstein, once a Red Sox GM, but now the man behind the curtain in Chicago.

The Cubs organization is on the verge of renovating the ancient field, placing a giant scoreboard before the bleachers across the street. People are angry to see their ruins rebuilt.
If you build it, dead goats will come.

Yes, Ray, like an army steamrolling across history, the Cubs fans are likely to come to blows over changes to their loveable losing Cubbies.

Though a few mythomaniacs may believe this is an attempt to lift the curse on the losers, most others of a rational bent see this as a negative vibe. There is nothing friendly in decapitating a goat for the cause of winning a World Series.

The legend depicted in The Godfather is that the Hollywood producer denying the Frank Sinatra clone a movie role was made an offer he could not refuse.

The right of first refusal shall now fall to Tom Ricketts, but we suspect he will press charges when the culprit is discovered, even if it means another losing season.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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