Ex-Rutgers Coach Mike Rice May Be Moving Out of The Country

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Sunday, 7 April 2013

image for Ex-Rutgers Coach Mike Rice May Be Moving Out of The Country
Fired Rutgers University basketball Coach Mike Rice shown sitting in his backyard. (Photo by Rico Chorizo).

NEW YORK CITY - Sporting Chance Magazine is reporting that disgraced former Rutgers University basketball coach Mike Rice has received so much hate mail, text messages, phone calls, tweets, and emails that he is in a state of depression.

Sherwood Frisbee with SCM stated that all of the hate mail that Coach Rice is receiving is absolutely justified.

Coach Rice, or rather ex-Coach Rice was fired after a video showing him shoving, pushing, hitting, kicking, and even biting some of his players went viral.

Rice of course denied that he bit anyone, but Frisbee has a photo that was sent to him over the Internet showing one of the Rutgers players with teeth bites just below his belly button.

Coach Rice reportedly denied the accusation saying that his teeth are not sharp enough to leave teeth marks like the ones shown on the player's belly.

Frisbee spoke with Rice for a few minutes and the coach informed him that all of his life he wanted some recognition and now he is recognized as the meanest coach in the history of collegiate sports.

He emphasized that he was sorry and said that the reason why he acted like he did was due to the 15 cups of coffee that he drinks on a daily basis.

Rice did express the fact that everyone hates him, including a nun who saw him at a convenience store and shot the finger at him.

He says that he feels that it is time for him to get the hell out of Dodge. He disclosed that he is seriously thinking about moving out of the country.

When asked where he may be going he said that he did not want to say for fear that someone would follow him.

[WRITER'S NOTE: I talked to my editor who made a call to Charles Barkley. "Fat Boy" Barkley stated that Mike Rice is presently planning on moving to either Mexicali, Mexico, or La Paz, Bolivia.]

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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