Lady Gaga wins Nobel Prize in Chemistry

Funny story written by Q. William Bacon

Thursday, 25 November 2010

image for Lady Gaga wins Nobel Prize in Chemistry
The 2010 Chemistry Nobel goes to Lady Gaga

STOCKHOLM, Sweden - Lady Gaga is the recipient of the 2010 Nobel Prize in Chemistry for her work in "ground-breaking experiments and applications of the novel two-dimensional material, graphene."

The chemist/musician explained, "I needed a new fashion concept for my Monster Ball tour and I thought, Wouldn't it be cool to have skin that lights up? The next best thing was a very sheer liquid-crystal-display bodysuit made from graphene. A sheet of graphene is only molecule thick and perfectly transparent, but is 200 times stronger than steel and is a nearly perfect electrical conductor.

"So I made the bodysuit and my techies wired it for image display. I would look naked, except I'm clothed in television. How perfect is that?"

Asked if she would wear graphene to the official Nobel ceremony, she replied, "No, I'm going to wear a beige pantsuit and white shirt with giant ruffles and flounces like Sweden's ABBA. The prize money is only about a million, but the trip would be worth it if I could meet ABBA."

Asked how she was able to produce sheets of graphene, she replied, "I used scotch tape to remove single layers from pencil lead. Like, duh?"

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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