Cosmetic Surgeons Reveal Women Want Smaller Vaginas, Men Want Larger Penises

Written by Buck E Filbert

Saturday, 7 July 2007

Hey!

The story you are trying to access may cause offense, may be in poor taste, or may contain subject matter of a graphic nature. This story was written as a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you wish to back out now, please click here to go back to the home page.

image for Cosmetic Surgeons Reveal Women Want Smaller Vaginas, Men Want Larger Penises
He's too big, she's too small

Las Vegas Nevada, A consortium of cosmetic surgeons gathered at the Rio Hotel and Casino this week to discuss the newest trends in plastic surgery. After comparing notes and looking at the statistics this year the group came to the conclusion, this has been the year for vaginal reducing, reconstructive surgery and obscenely huge penis enlargement being the top, elected surgery overall.

Dr. Huge Member said, "elective procedures use to be pretty noninvasive, you know nose jobs, tummy tucks and breast enhancements were our bread and butter, now we have women looking for either extremely small, tight genitals or on the other end of the spectrum men in search of extremely large genitalia. I had a man come in for a Prince Albert last week." (The PA pierces the penis from the outside of the frenulum and into the urethra.

At some point it seems these two diametrically opposed desires are going to come into direct conflict with one another. Surgically reduced vaginas collide with medically altered huge erect penises. Someone must win and someone must loose this battle of opposing sizes.

My money is on the enhanced male members because they are the ones that originally turned the women's vaginas into cavernous, echoing, orifices to begin with. Be they small, or large, orifices live for fulfillment. By default they will once again become candidates for reduction once again.

A recent investigation has revealed some MD's have been intentionally introducing vaginal reduction patients with penis enlargement patients knowing full well the implications of this mating. Investigators think the Doctors are intentionally making these introductions in the hope of future business.

For plastic surgeons it's a revolving door of skin clipping and sausage stuffing. Round and round it goes where it stops nobody knows.


From the surgeons table of
Buck E Filbert
07.07.07

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Spoof news topics



Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more