Prozac Monitor Hits Area Drug Stores And Best Buy

Funny story written by kegoguinness

Tuesday, 8 May 2007

image for Prozac Monitor Hits Area Drug Stores And Best Buy
The PMM31XC, dubbed "Smiley", in stores May 15

Manhattan, NYC, NY - Pharmaceutical Giant Eli Lilly, manufacturer of Prozac, today held a press conference in upper Manhattan to unveil it's much anticipated "Prozac Monitor". This clever yet simple device will be worn by users of the miracle mood-stabilizing drug to tell them when it's time for another dose of mommy's little helper.

Lilly spokeswoman Margaret Schneider tauted the monitor, dubbed "Smiley" as "a simple and effective way to remind our clients that it's time to pop a little magic."

Schneider explained that a green smiley "means all is well and dad won't tell his goddamned overbearing boss to shove off," while a red angry face indicates "mom is about to kill the stupid little bitch at the Macy's counter, and now is a good time to self-medicate."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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