Contrary to reports that he was dead, verified sources have comfirmed that chivalry is in stable condition and doing well. "It wasn't looking good there for a minute," said Dr. Chase Lancet of New England Medical Center, as he held open the door f...
It is rumored that Martin Shrekli raised the prices of pharmaceutical products to lessen the total world population, being part of a secret organization that shares the same views as he does. Raising the prices of pills that prevented amenable mo...
It is not often that we at The Spoof are victims of hoaxes, fraudulent behaviour or what the great unwashed call "scams", but in the case of so-called Dr. Quigley I feel it is behoven upon me to apologise for his sexually obsessed articles and gratuitous behaviour. The Spoof is a reputable news organ and we thoroughly research the material which we produce, and we vet our employees and their qu...
Dear Dr Quigley I suffer from recurrent migraines, but my GP always wants me to give a sample of semen whenever I see her, and she insists on helping me. Is this right? S. Perm-Donor, Balham. Lots of patients would love such personal service from their GP. It sounds like she is using the ancient Chinese practice of acuwankture to relieve your headaches and I am sure you feel much better afterw...
Smallpox. Along with cholera, rickets and other indignities, it was once considered a rite of passage for many humans to suffer this killer disease with its 30 per cent death rate and legacy of pock marked faces for survivors. Those were the days. Days to which anti-vaccine fundamentalists want to take us back. Many of them are fans of discredited and struck-off British doctor Andrew Wakefiel...
Local Hospital, Last Resort Methodist, has opened its second food court in an effort to get more patients into the hospital. “The first food court didn’t have enough disease in their food. This time, with options like McFryBird and Lard Cow, we’r...
Bethesda, Maryland - The National Institute of Health has found out how super-bugs are created by hospitals. It’s very simple. Sick people’s bodily fluids are sent down plumbing drains where they meet up with anti-biotics. All the non-super germs ar...
New York - Donald J. Trump released on Wednesday the results from his most recent physical examination, revealing that he is overweight, takes a statin for cholesterol, and is an asshole. Although Mr. Trump's weight has been a source of debate, wi...
The newly elected head of the Australian Medical Association (AMA), Dr James Gibbon, has announced that from next week, General Practitioners (GPs) will cut their consultation fees to $10. This is a cut of about $70 in the cost of the average ten-m...
Dallas, TX - Our man, Chip Fairway, is out on the long lonely pro golf trail, where it's Texas Swing time on the PGA Tour. Along the way, he has uncovered the tale of a man who has seen some adversity on his way to becoming a pro golf journey man. Er...
Los Angeles, CA - Humans, much like gorillas: are interested, influenced, and educated by viewing recordings of their own species copulating on monitors. Humans love pornography and it influences the sex practices they engage in. Unless the last porn...
Fort Wayne, IN: Mindi and Bindy rose to fame 5 years ago after the biography and accompanying documentary (Eye to Eye; The Only Way to See It) gave hope to millions of able bodied people who realized how much worse their lives could be. In the expose...
Stockholm Sweden: A 16 year old with ambiguous genitalia has been allowed to undergo a "double sex change" operation. According to the doctors the parents couldn't be more proud of their child. They see "he and she" (soon to be she and he) as a t...
Los Angeles, CA-So an ophthalmologist and a psychoanalyst get on an elevator... This may sound like the start of a great joke, but in actuality it was the beginning of a terrifying descent into unprofessional chaos. Jorge Valdez, a once highly res...
After rigorous studies at Columbian University, scholars have determined that most Americans need the drug Itsinurhedicone, or more commonly known to consumers as "Normal." Although the mind altering drug is frowned upon by many moralists, Doctor...
Top health officials have issued a warning to people not to put Toblerones in a fridge. They state that when the triangular chocolate bar becomes cold and hard it can become a "lethal weapon capable of damaging members of the public and even buildin...
Following recent reports which incited outrage when it was revealed that doctors were opting out of working unsociable hours, new proposals have been passed that allow them the option of not having to see patients at all. Under the new scheme doct...
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