Scientist Developes Turd Steaks, Truth stranger than spoof?

Funny story written by Buck E Filbert

Thursday, 4 April 2013


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Cut out the middle man, toilet feast

A Japanese scientist has developed the worlds first food group made from human excrement.

Mitsuyuki Ikeda, a researcher from the Okayama Laboratory, found that sewage mud has a lot of protein in it, beef has a lot of protein in it so why not combine the great taste of beef with the over abundance of sewage. A win/win in almost any regular situation.

You might ask why a research scientist figured out he could synthesize beef steak out of poo poo. Well, he was asked by Tokyo Sewage to figure out something to do with all the sewage mud they have stock piled. His solution, lets eat it.

Ikeda pointed out that there's sure to be some initial resistance to eating excrement based foods but says the benefits far out weigh the drawbacks.

Ikeda went on to point out that cattle contribute 16% of greenhouse gasses and consume a huge amount of resources being fattened up for the slaughter house.

Ikeda has come up with a slogan for his new steak product.

The Circle of Life.

Yes, I'll have the crap burger with a urine cocktail.

From Sunset and Vine in Beautiful Downtown Hollywood California 90028

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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