What the hell is in there?
Me and some buddies went spelunking to find what’s inside that … THING!
It was warm, humid, like marsh gas, and smelled similar. As though God died and was being roasted by Satan over a slow sulfur fire and served up with refried beans.
Pictures of high school girls … bizarre theories were held as truth … flat earth? possibly … tiny creatures covered in spines, drooling black ichor, sniffing my pant legs … I kicked a few but they screamed “Commie! Biden’s laptop! Migrant! Tree hugger! … the list went on … I shone a light against the walls and they cringed like Dracula at a Caesar salad buffet, heavy with garlic …
Some Christians came by and tried to drive a nail into it, but it was as hard as steel … so they had to look for another “resurrected” god to worship and who would force weak minded and tall browed losers to rapture them all with guns and Bibles and Texas-style ribs! Mmmmm, taste that religion!
Marjorie Taylor Greene was not a fan of it anymore, so she denounced it as foreign and non-white and thus evil … but it still didn’t tell me …
What the hell is in there?
