'How to be a succesfull bully' by Biff Tannen

Funny story written by Ben Macnair

Friday, 20 November 2020

image for 'How to be a succesfull bully' by Biff Tannen
Who are you calling a clown?

Hello everybody,

You might remember me from a series of documentaries set in the 1980s called Back to the Future.

The first time you saw me, I was a bullying middle manager.
The second time, I was a bullying teenager, who happened to be punched out by the school's biggest nerd, but we shall overlook that.

The first rule about being a bully, is that everyone has to fear you.
The second rule, is that you have to have a gang around you, who all look menacing, but are all too thick to disagree with anything you say or do,
The third rule is that you have to take some pride in your work.

Of course, there are other bullies out there, some of them hiding behind even bigger names, and more important people, but they are not proper bullies. A proper bully will never unintentionally bully someone else, whilst expect the bigger boys to protect them. If there are bigger boys to protect a bully, then they are not the bully.

A former classmate of Tannen's asked 'Biff Tannen, wasn't he the bloke that was knocked out by George McFly. I
liked George. He was a good bloke.'

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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