North Korea Travel Guide

Written by Al N.

Thursday, 30 June 2016

image for North Korea Travel Guide
DPRK residents searching for new ways to praise the Supreme Leader.

Pyongyang, DPRK This is the Official Guide to Travel in the Democratic People's Republic of Korea.

Very Important Rules:

1. Remember that the reason you are allowed to visit the Utopia of Earth, North Korea, is through the benevolence of our Supreme Leader, grandson of the Eternal Leader and son of the Dear Leader, Kim Jong-Un. Always remember to sing his praises while you are on his soil and you will have many reasons to praise him!

2. Do NOT go anywhere at any time. At some point, which you will not know in advance, a guard will show up and guide you around this wondrous land. You will view special Potemkin Villages and phony filled-with-food grocery stores especially erected for YOUR benefit, so be sure to thank the Supreme Leader.

3. Remember, you have nothing to fear. Although the 1 in 10 people we do detain have no idea they are committing a crime, if you are not evil and remember to praise the Supreme Leader you should eventually end up home and maybe even still healthy.

4. Do NOT ask to see the labor camps unless you wish to permanently reside in one. And there are no labor camps, only re-education camps for those who neglect to praise the Supreme Leader.

More rules will be given you upon your arrival. Thank you, Praise the Supreme Leader, and have a nice trip!

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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