A List of 10 Little Known Facts About David Letterman

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Saturday, 19 May 2012


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David has said that the rumor that he has a "CBS" tattoo on his back is not true.

David Letterman has stated that the greatest late night talk show host of all time was Johnny Carson. He pointed out that Johnny is without a doubt the best even though Jay "The Chinmaster" Leno thinks that he is.

David has gone on record as saying that Leno and him both learned 90 percent of what they know about being late night TV talk show hosts from the great Johnny Carson.

He then added that both learned the other 10 percent from watching old shows of Jack Parr, Steve Allen, and Waldo "Coconuts" Cocafelli.

Letterman quickly admits that he came up with the idea for The Late Night Top Ten List from David Wallechinsky author of The Book of Lists, who got the idea from the old 50s television music show Your Hit Parade, which picked it up from Billboard Magazine, who got the idea from the Bible (The Ten Commandments).


  1. David has admitted that the gap between his front teeth is a result of a Red Rover, Red Rover injury he suffered as a young boy.
  2. Up until six years ago he was seriously thinking about changing his name from David Letterman to David Email.
  3. Out of all of the tens of thousands of jokes that he estimates he has written he has never once written a single knock-knock joke, nor a joke about Wyoming, nor a joke about Genghis Khan.
  4. Letterman has confessed that if his wife ever divorces him he would like to marry Heidi Montag.
  5. He said that back during his college days he once kissed a woodchuck just for the hell of it.
  6. David owns 90 percent of a piƱata factory in Tijuana, Mexico.
  7. He has admitted to being a huge Marilyn Monroe fan and estimates that he has about 12,000 photos of the 50s sex symbol, plus he owns one of her lipsticks, and two Marilyn Monroe Inflatable Dolls.
  8. Letterman cannot stand Sarah Palin because of her hunting obsession and he truly believes that probably within two years she will have sexual reassignment surgery.
  9. David is so rich that he actually owns about 25 percent of his home state of Indiana.
  10. He has admitted that he and Madonna have arm wrestled a total of 27 times and she has won 24 times.

NOTE: David Letterman has denied the rumor that he was asked to star in the lead role in Staccato Monteverdi's Yo Y'all - The Richard Pryor Story.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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