Humble Pie

Funny story written by Temerius Frost

Friday, 1 October 2010

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Talk to your children about the dangers of socialism

Public, it's a somber day. A recent poll showed that near on forty percent of America's youth support socialism over capitalism. I had intended upon being sickened in my post today, but an overwhelming sorrow o'ertakes my oration, obviously brought out by our less than omnipotent offsprings' impotent, incredulous intake of external propaganda.

Moreover, more malicious than making maddening polls mortifying the morals meticulously marvelously carved out by capricious capitalists, of which we should capitulate to: Audacious activities aspiring to an autocratic AND bureaucratic anomalous artificial government.

But people, the fact of the matter is that there is no one that we can blame other than ourselves. The biggest influence on children is, of course, their parents. And when they hear us complain about this and that in the "market" or how we've been lied to and led astray by our government, they naturally assume that our complaints mean that we do not support the aforementioned establishments. This of course is a falsehood. We adore our country and everything about it.

We cannot, parents of America, assume that our children know to what extent we are dissatisfied with our way of life. We must express our distaste for governmental action and the hills and valleys in the stock market in such a way as to convey our interminable respect for said subjects. So let this, please, be a warning to us all.

If we allow our children to continue to extrapolate from our comments that we dislike the structure of our country, they will develop a genuine dislike for it. So talk to your children about the dangers of a socialist or any other foreign economic system and those of a totalitarian or a utilitarian government. Education is the road toward conservatives, and we need not have that road diverted. Change, people, is not only not good, it is NOT necessary.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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