Twilight Eclipse star Bryce Dallas Howard knocks the spots off Kristen Stewart

Funny story written by queen mudder

Tuesday, 29 June 2010

image for Twilight Eclipse star Bryce Dallas Howard knocks the spots off Kristen Stewart
A preview clip of the movie's fight scene

Hollywood - (Zitty Occultation News): The fiery-haired Village, Lady In the Water, Manderlay, Spider-Man 3, Terminator Salvation, The Loss of a Teardrop Diamond and The Twilight Saga: Eclipse actress is sending bloodpressure rates soaring ahead of her widely anticipated latest performance.

Sneak previews of her vampire protagonist role of Victoria depict a sexy and formidable brawling beauty out for revenge for the destruction of her lover James.

"It's a hormone-fuelled performance that makes Kristen look downright shagged-out," iconic celebwatch site LA FagHagSlagMag.con commented today.

"And not just because her nipples swell up like ripe acorns during the fight scene with Edward," the website's movie review editor added.

"There's a passion and lust for violence in her Victoria rendition that just connects with tumescent males.

"Movie theaters should be warned tyo be on standby with the Handiwipes."

Robert Pattinson is 69.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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