Las Vegas, NV - This week marked a milestone for one lucky lad who had the fortune to become the one millionth person to get his own show in Vegas as an Elvis impersonator. Gruud MacPhereson, an out-of-work whiskey kegger from Glasgow, couldn't believe it when told the news by the owner of the Grand Golden Jackpot Hotel and Casino.
When asked to comment, MacPhereson said, "I waddna rally lookin' ta stay in Vegas more en a coopla days, when someone spotted me drunk onna stage in th' middle a th' neit singin' my rendition of Hounddoog en said eye was a dead ringer ferr Elvis. Now I'm in my own show an evre'thin'. It's a dream cam trew."
Sponsors of the "Never Too Many Elvis Impersonators" contest claim that MacPhereson is about the closest thing to Elvis they've seen so far, yet also one of the most entertaining, both sober and drunk. MacPhereson's show will be the first to incorporate white, rhinestone-studded kilts and a bagpipe accompaniment. "You'll not hear a more stirring rendition of 'Love Me Tender' than when Gruud sings it with the bagpipe in the background," said one of MacPhereson's loyal fans.
Most people are under the impression that Elvis impersonators are from the United States, particularly southern states such as Tennessee, Georgia, Alabama, and Mississippi, but in reality, about a third of the now million impersonators come from foreign countries. "We once had a fellow from Turkey who went by the name of Ahmed Pressley. What a hoot. You couldn't understand a word he said, but when he started singing like Elvis, man you could close your eyes and think the king was right there on stage. Ahmed always closed his shows with 'Tank you veddy much, See you in hell.' He was one of our all-time favorites.
MacPhereson hasn't said how long he plans on staying in Vegas, but his friends say he's not in that much of a hurry to get back to Scotland. His wife left him, ironically, because she couldn't take another Elvis song. Her loss, Vegas' gain.
