Friday, 26 February 2010

image for "We Are The World" Remake Voted Special Grammy As Biggest Piece of Crap Ever
Michael Jackson's original nose could not be reached for comment

An almost unanimous vote by Caucasian, Oriental, and Hispanic artists has declared that the "We Are The World" remake is "the biggest piece of crap ever" (their words) and the worst waste of musical talent of all times. The song remake, which was done to benefit the survivors of the earthquake in Haiti, has been almost universally panned outside of the black community since its release on Super Bowl Sunday.

This is the first time that a special Grammy has been selected after the ceremonies. According to Grammy officials, however, "this was worse than Don't Worry, Be Happy or any Sing Along With Elmo."

Said one musical agent with ASCAP, "this is just garbage. The first song was merely mediocre, but this is sheer awful. If you sang it on American Idol, Simon Cowell would call it bloody awful and scream song choice into your face. It's a perfect example of why most people who dislike rap music refer to it as jungle junk."

A member of the CMA said that "it just stinks. The cameo of Michael Jackson from the original was obviously thrown in to make us remember the pedophile's contribution to the original. Of course, we all know that Michael really wanted to sing I own the world, I want your children on the original, but the others made him change the lyrics."

Dr. Lamont Shaquille Doggy-Style Grey, professor of Ebonics at Harvard University (and a member of the famous beer summit), offered the dissenting opinion: "It be cool. It be bad. I be chillin' with a white bitch ho."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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