Written by Bill Licks

Thursday, 25 February 2010

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image for Smash Hits... sorry NME award results in full
The Coveted NME Award

Here's the full of results of the Shitwaves NME Awards 2010

Best British 3 Piece Band From Teignmouth - Muse

Only Festival That We Could Think Of - Glastonbury

Best New Band Who We Don't Know Much About But Have Quite A Cool Name Anyway - Bombay Bicycle Club

Best Old Band Who Released A Compilation Album Last Year And We're Only Giving An Award To Because Madness Couldn't Be Bothered To Turn Up - The Specials

Best Song Written By A Daughter Of Someone Off The Bill - La Roux, In For The Kill

Best Twat Called Lily Allen - Lily Allen

Best Northern Band From Somewhere Up North - The Arctic Monkeys

Best Live Event That Was Just A Short Cab Ride From The NME Offices - Blur at Hyde Park

Best International Band Who Are In Truth Absolute Shit - Paramore

Best TV Show That Isn't The Mighty Boosh As Usual - The Inbetweeners

Best Solo Artist Who Isn't That Twat Lily Allen - Jamie T

Pointless Noel Fielding Award - The Mighty Boosh Live

Best Video Featuring Unwashed Scottish People - Biffy Clyro, The Captain

Best Album By Some Band That Turned Up And Isn't Muse - Kasabian, West Ryder Pauper Lunatic Asylum

Best Let's Give Them Another Award For The Fuck Of It And To Get Our Moneys Worth - Kasabian

Best Kasabian Have Had 2 Awards So We Want Another One - Muse

Ah, Who Else Has Turned Up Award - Paul Weller

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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