X-Factor's '08 Winner Alexandra Burke Shows Off Her Bikini-Clad Body In Barbados

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Wednesday, 30 December 2009

image for X-Factor's '08 Winner Alexandra Burke Shows Off Her Bikini-Clad Body In Barbados
Alexandra Burke's Nikes on the beach at St. James, Barbados. (Photo courtesy of Simon Cowell).

ST. JAMES, Barbados - Alexandra Burke, winner of last year's X-Factor, showed off her slim and trim body in six different bikini swimsuits on the beaches of St. James.

The 21-year-old Londoner frolicked in the sun as she made sand castles and sand people on the beach that resembled X-Factor judges Simon Cowell, Cheryl Cole, Dannii Minogue, and Louis Walsh.

The Louis Walsh sand person was quite fat and it had a mouth that covered more than half of its body, just like the real life Louis Walsh.

Dannii Minogue's sand person looked somewhat self-conscious as she outed the Danyl Johnson sand person.

Simon Cowell's sand person was devoid of any hand hair and upper chest hair, much like the real Simon. It also was wearing a black T-Shirt.

The Cheryl Cole sand person was of course naked and it was holding a soccer ball in front of her you-know-what.

Alexandra jokingly said that her sunscreen was not working as her skin had turned dark and she actually resembled an African-American.

One of her close friends, asked if the sun had also caused her lips to double in size as well. Lexy, as some people call her, smiled and said that her lips were the result of genes.

Lexy said that she is thrilled that her single "Bad Boys" went all the way to the very top of the music charts. She said that she hopes that her follow up song "Broken Heels" can achieve the same success.

Miss Burke said that the song "Broken Heels" was written by Rihanna's ex-boyfriend Chris Brown and tells the story of how Rihanna tripped on her imported six-inch Italian stiletto heels.

Alexandra says that after she returns back to Great Britain she will start rehearsing for her upcoming U.S. musical tour entitled, Alexandra Tours The South - The Land of The Tired Cotton Pickin' Cotton Pickers.

In an unrelated story. It has now been well over a month and the Rev. Al Sharpton has still not commented on Tiger Woods and his dozen or so "Scorecard Cutey Club."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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