Tiger Woods Signs A $20 Million Contract To Be A Spokesman For Viagra

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Wednesday, 16 December 2009

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image for Tiger Woods Signs A $20 Million Contract To Be A Spokesman For Viagra
The new Blue Tiger Viagra Pills which Tiger Woods has endorsed and agreed to be the spokesman for.

QUEBEC, Canada - Tiger Woods has been recently dropped by some of his advertising sponsors due to his involvement and participation in "Golf Gate."

But there is a little glimmer of sunshine overlooking the cloudy 18th hole. It seems that the Canadian pharmaceutical giant that produces more Viagra than anyone in the world has just signed the golf playing Casanova to a $20 million contract.

Gaston Beauregard spokesperson for the Quebec-based Up Up and Away Viagra Company said that they have been looking for someone to act as spokesman for their product for years.

They had approached several high profile individuals but had been turned down. When asked to reveal who had turned them down Beauregard refused to give the names.

[EDITOR'S NOTE: I made a quick call to my good friend and self-described know-it-all Larry King and he informed me that the men who had turned down Mr. Beauregard's offer were Bill Clinton, George Hamilton, A-Rod, and Mick Jagger.]

The company had been in close communication with a spokesperson for Tiger Woods before the "Scorecard Cutey Club" scandal broke but they had failed to reach an agreement.

Mr. Beauregard noted that all of a sudden a few days ago the world's most famous skirt-chasing Don Juan, Tiger Woods himself, called him and said that he would be willing to accept the role of his company's Viagra spokesperson.

Initially Woods had asked that he be paid a fee of $30 million. But when he contacted Up Up and Away, he told them that he would agree to take $20 million if they would promise to send the entire amount directly to his bank in Beverly Hills within 24 hours.

The company agreed and so sometime in January Tiger will film his first commercial for his own personal line of Viagra pills called Blue Tiger Viagra Pills.

In other news. It is being reported by Central American Radio (CAR) that the 9,000 foot volcano Mount Platano Split in Costa Rica, which had been threatening to erupt, has settled down. CAR has stated that the Costa Rican Army, with the help of the Costa Rican Navy, and 100 Costa Rican streetwalkers spent two days stuffing millions of bananas non-stop into the rumbling volcano.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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