Fabregas - "Make an honest woman out of me"

Funny story written by foshizzle

Thursday, 5 November 2009

image for Fabregas - "Make an honest woman out of me"

Arsenal Captain Cesc Fabregas sent a chilling ultimatum to his Manager, Arsene Wenger, by claiming the French man has 48 hours to make an honest woman of him, or he will find a manager that will.

"Frankly, I am sick of this. I feel the last 5 years have been a waste of my life. I was young when I arrived here, just 16, I didn't mind being Arsene's bit on the side. As I got older, I kept questioning where the relationship was going. All I got were vague promises, 'he would tell his wife', 'we would come out to the press', and nothing. The only thing stopping me from joing Barca this summer was a promise that I was the only girl for him. If he's not ready for the commitment, Pep Gaurdiola has a ring and everything".

Fabregas went onto reveal he also had to deal with the agony of seeing Arsene romantically entangled with other girls.

"First Van Persie, then Eboue, and finally Adebayor broke his heart this summer. When he took me down to his Villa in the South of France, he just wasn't the same. We didn't laugh like we used to or tickle eachothers feet. I used to wake up in the middle of the night to hear him sobbing. He denied everything ofcourse. After I got back to England, Pep offered to get down on one knee I could have done it, but deep down I've always been in love with Arsene. Thats why I've put up with his playboy lifestyle for so long. Enough is enough. He can either marry me, or admit the past 5 years of walks on the beach, candle-lit dinners and grab ass in the shower after games, has meant nothing".

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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