Wenger: "Redknapp pinched my bottom in tunnel"

Funny story written by foshizzle

Wednesday, 4 November 2009

image for Wenger: "Redknapp pinched my bottom in tunnel"
Bottoms Up

Arsenal Manager Arsene Wenger shocked the footballing world today, when he claimed Harry Redknapp copped a feel of his bottom, shortly after the Arsenal Tottenham match on Saturday.

Wenger admits the astonishment he felt after what he described as an "assault" was what prevented him from making this revelation earlier.

"Maybe I am not from the English culture, but I think I have lived here long enough to know, bottom pinching might be normal among players of the same team, but for rival managers this is not right".

Wenger was adamant it was not simply the customary slap on the buttocks, often taken as a sign of congratulation between team mates.

"I had already shaken his hand and was making my way down the tunnel, when I felt a sharp pinch. There was no open palmed slap. I don't know if he was trying to make a fool of me, but he then winked and walked past me to the away dressing room. I think it is upto the authorities to decide what to do next".

Harry Redknapp was not available for comment on the situation, but a witness who refused to be named, claimed it may have been Wenger that initiated the exchange.

"As we were leaving the pitch and the managers were shaking hands, Arsene definately moved in for a hug, clutching Harry's bossom against his own. After dropping a hint like that, I don't think he can complain if Harry wanted to get a bit naughty as well".

The League Managers Association have promised a full investigation into this claim, and have asked for written statements to be provided from both sides.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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