BBC Blames Bristol Band Massive Attack for Twitter Crash

Funny story written by Roy Turse

Friday, 7 August 2009

image for BBC Blames Bristol Band Massive Attack for Twitter Crash
Unfinished Sympath

The BBC has decided that the Trip-Hop/Electronica band Massive Attack were responsible for the intentional Distributed Denial of Service assault on the Twitter website. It is thought that the band may have been attempting to stop Twitter users from continually asking "what's that music on that TV show/film/advert" and never finding out the answer.

The BBC are standing by their story despite the band issuing a press release claiming their innocence. In the release the band say they have 'no idea' why the BBC has targeted them, and that they have 'no beef' with Twitter.

Band members D (real name 3D) and G (real name Daddy G) are now being hunted by the Internet Police for the crime. A spokesperson told us that in addition to charges of criminal damage and hacking, they would also be indicted for rendering Ashton Kutcher's life meaningless for two hours.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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