Big Brother Alex Violated

Funny story written by Monkey Woods

Friday, 13 June 2008

image for Big Brother Alex Violated
Alex de Gale (isn't it?)

Big Brother housemate and disrespected black person Alexandra de Gale, was yesterday involved in a new crisis when, in front of million of TV viewers, she was openly violated by fellow housemate, Rex, who, to be honest, doesn't look the violating type.

Alex, fresh from her Respect Row, was sitting talking to Dennis in the ashtray, when she was approached by Rex, and had her cigarettes snatched. This, she claimed, was a Complete Violation of her rights as a black person, not to have her cigarettes snatched.

De Gale likes to use words like respect and violate, words whose meanings have become distorted for dramatic effect by certain members of society who feel they have something to prove.

Speaking in a Diary Room interview afterwards, she puffed:

"It was a violation,
I'm crushed wiv indignation,
Listen up to my frustration,
All across de nation."

When Rex later tried to apologise, Alex told him:

"Don't violate me or ma cigarettes again, mate, na mean? Uvverwise, I might get violent, vindicated, vociferous, volatile or vol-au-vont, na mean?"


Shizzle. Shabba.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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