Ellen DeGeneres, Chelsea Clinton to marry

Funny story written by Tragic Rabbit

Sunday, 18 May 2008

Hey!

The funny story you are trying to access may cause offense, may be in poor taste, or may contain subject matter of a graphic nature. This story was written as a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you wish to back out now, please click here to go back to the home page.

image for Ellen DeGeneres, Chelsea Clinton to marry
Rosie reportedly furious.

Ellen DeGeneres and daughter of former President Clinton are putting the California Supreme Court ruling in favor of gay marriage into action -- she and Chelsea Victoria Clinton plan to wed, DeGeneres announced during the taping of a popular television game show.

DeGeneres was taping an episode of "The Bachelorette Show" on Thursday, the same day the state's high court struck down California laws against gay marriage, and the landmark show is to air soon, a person close to the production said.

The person, who was not authorized to discuss the matter publicly but did so anyway, spoke to reporters on condition of anonymity and a large cash payment.

Citing the court's ruling, DeGeneres said she and girlfriend Clinton (not to be confused with any past or present presidential candidate) would be getting married.

Clinton, 28, who was in the studio, and DeGeneres, 50, were applauded by McCain supporters inexplicably seeded throughout the studio audience. A person close to the production said the applause may signal the final nail in the Clinton campaign coffin rather than indicate actual support for gay marriage.

The court ruling means same-sex couples could tie the knot in as little as a month. However, religious and social conservatives are seeking to put a constitutional amendment on the ballot in November that would undo the Supreme Court ruling and ban gay marriage, especially those between celebrities.

DeGeneres and the charming Chelsea have been a familiar couple at Hollywood events, including the Academy Awards.

Previously, DeGeneres had a brief, high-profile relationship with fellow talk-show host Rosie O'Donnell, a courtship that fell through after Degeneres' long-overdue visit to an ophthalmologist.

In an interview with Hog Breeders Gazette magazine, Degeneres said she hoped she and Chelsea are "together for the rest of our lives."

When contacted for comment, pseudo-actress and star-fucker Anne Heche offered no printable remarks.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more