Mustache Included in New 'Seven Wonders of the World' List

Funny story written by Gail Farrelly

Saturday, 7 July 2007

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A Runner-up in the Mustache Contest

Flowers, beer, and tributes from all over the world are mobbing the offices of The Spoof today, as news broke that the mustache of The Spoof owner Mark Lowton had made the prestigious list.

Humble as always, Mark said he was overwhelmed by the honor and confessed that he was busy getting the mustache cleaned and groomed for the occasion. He blamed the need for cleaning on the many food items sent to him over the years by one of The Spoof's chief writers, Jalapenoman from New Mexico. "The jalapenos, onions, green chilis and garlic all stick in my mustache, sometimes for months at a time," Mark complained. "Agreed," said Mark's long-suffering girlfriend, who had campaigned vigorously behind the scenes for the 'Wonders of the World' honor for the mustache, anticipating that it would result in the desperately needed cleaning. Asked for a comment by the media about the honor accorded to Mark's mustache, she jumped up and down and shouted "Yippee" thousands of times -- until she required sedation.

Lowton has revealed that the wheelbarrow used to wheel around the sixteen-foot mustache WILL be included as part of the 'Seven Wonders' honor. NOT included, much to Mark's disappointment, is his electronically tagged pygmy friend who has been pushing around the wheelbarrow for years.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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