Hilton appeal offers 'doing 45 days behind bar' instead of jail

Funny story written by queen mudder

Wednesday, 9 May 2007

image for Hilton appeal offers 'doing 45 days behind bar' instead of jail
45 days behind one of these

California - (Ass Mess): Attorneys representing Paris Hilton in her continuing appeal over DUI conviction violations have offered a plea-bargain where their client would serve the mandatory 45 day sentence working behind a bar in a LA run-down area's charitable social club.

"Behind a bar or behind bars? That is the quid pro quo.

"Anybody as beautiful, talented and blonde as our client shouldn't have to endure the ingominy of jailhouse corrective underwear.

"The alternative sentence of spreading beauty, hope, charm and cleavage to underpriviledged drinkers at the LA DownTown Charity Workers Co-Op Bar should be a legally viable option," a spokesman for her attorneys said today.

Hilton, 26, has been reported as having stamped her pretty little size 4 foot after Judge Sauer told her she is going to jail for 45 days after chancing her luck one time too many and then pleading peroxide-induced ignorance of the law in her defence.

The appeal wil be heard later this week but her chances of succeeding are said to be slim given that Judge Sauer could stamp his foot as well and double the existing sentence to 90 days if he gets any more pissed off with the whole sorry business.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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