Why Does French President Macron Speak Better English Than Donald Trump?

Funny story written by K.C. Bell

Wednesday, 26 February 2025

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"C'est si bon...se bon, se bon..."

Besides his ability to speak better English, Macron also has a larger vocabulary than Donald Trump. He doesn’t rely on two words repeated several times in one sentence, again and again. Macron expresses himself intelligently, with a larger vocabulary, and will even add examples. Trump can’t.  

Forget that Macron also sat up straight, not hunched over, like Trump, who looked as though he survived a truck collision.

The French President also has a neater appearance. He didn’t wear eyeliner, white under-eye camouflage, orange face makeup, or his hair in a teenage duck tail. 

President Macron is also pro-democracy. Donald Trump? Trump is only pro-Trump. “I’ve got a great, great Chinese-made bible to sell you…”

That French guy also had the couilles to interrupt Trump whenever Trump made an outlandish pro—Putin, anti—Zelensky statement. Macron contradicted Trump, pointing out Trump’s error, in particular when Trump claimed that Ukraine had started the war with Russia. Macron said definitively that Russia was the aggressor who invaded Ukraine. 

If someone breaks into your home, you are not the aggressor. Right? Right! Amen.

Trump’s face turned orange to red, then slowly back to orange, but he remained poop-face silent. It’s a good bet Trump could not find Ukraine on a map. (Don’t tell anyone, but Trump didn’t know India bordered China. Not while he was in grammar school, but when he was already in the White House.)

Anyway, bravo, French President Macron. Seeing a grown-up in the White House who can speak English was a treat!

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The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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