Since the change from the Gulf of Mexico to the Gulf of America was so brilliantly accepted by folks, Donald Trump, fueled by a night of White House hamburgers and cokes, has decided to change Florida's name to Trumpida.
What could be more appropriate than renaming Florida Trumpida since Donald Trump is the most super orange-painted person in Florida? Remember, Florida also produces the most oranges in the entire world.
Maybe.
And why stop at Florida? Perhaps it's time for the U.S. flag to reflect the most essential color in Trump's world: orange. An orange stripe, or maybe an orange star? The possibilities are as endless as the supply of White House hamburgers.
Editor’s note: Have you been drinking?
Reply: No. Just viewing the future of America through Musk-Hamburger-inspired glasses.
Editor’s note: Add more tonic to the gin.
Any news organizations that do not support the name change from Florida to Trumpida and insist on naming Florida, Florida, will no longer be allowed to attend White House press conferences. They will be lying to the public, and this White House does not support or condone liars of the press.
What about the freedom of the press? Freedom of the press has been historically sacred, and flipping names overnight to suit someone's indigestion fed by Musk-Hamburgers borders on silly.
It is to be now called Trumpida. Or else. Those are the marching orders.
At least the marching orders did not include the goose step.
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