(SPOOF SATIRE) - Dolly Parton recently appeared on the very popular TV show, "The Ricky Gervais Talk & Shock Show, and she really had her dander up, as they say in Arkansas.
The 77-year-old gigantic bosomed country songstress wanted Ricky to know that all of the rumors that have been appearing in the National Inquirer and other supermarket tabloids, are nothing but damn, low-life lies that come from the hate-filled, jealous minds of heathen has-beens.
The rumors that Miss Dolly is talking about are the ones about her and her lifelong friend Judy Ogle being involved in tempestuously erotic, intimate sexcapades or sexploits, as they are referred to in Las Vegas.
Dolly told Rick, who critics say drinks a six-pack of Stella Artois beer during each show, that yes, although she does find Judy to be very pretty, very sexy, and very hot, the two have never, ever, even gotten to second base with each other.
Ricky grinned and asked that he would pay her (Dolly) $2,000 cash to watch, if she and Judy ever do decide to get into a boinking session.
SIDENOTE: And on that note Miss Dolly stood up, grabbed Ricky's glass of beer, and tossed it in his face, as she exclaimed, "Mr. Gervais, you are one sick, perverted fucking bastard!!!"
