TISHOMINGO, Oklahoma - (Celebrity Satire) - Close friends of the country music duo of Shelton and Stefani say that the two singers have been fighting like the Russians and the Ukrainians for quite sometime now.
It is no secret that Blake drinks beer like the British drink tea, and Gwen wears even more makeup that a Ringling Brothers, Barnum & Bailey Circus clown.
Plus one of the two is a Democrat and one is a Republican, which their maid said really has put a damper on the couple's horizontal hula (fucking).
The ranch foreman noted that Blake is very jealous at the fact that Gwen loves to sunbathe in her birthday suit, and she really does not give a shit if any of the ranch employees see her.
Blake has said on many occasions that it would be nice if he, being her darn husband, could be the only fella who gets to see his wife's tits, ass, and beaver.
Meanwhile Blake's harmonica player said that Shelton told him that he will be keeping the 95 head of cattle and Gwen will be keeping the 71 chickens and one of the two roosters.
