The Porn Industry Says Safe-Distancing is Killing Their Business

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Wednesday, 22 July 2020

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Porn star Hooha Katzenbaum is rumored to be President Donald Trump's all-time favorite porn star.

HOLLYWOOD – There is perhaps no industry in the entire United States that has been hit harder by the Trumpalooza pandemic than the porn industry.

A spokeswoman for the porn industry stated that the 6-foot distancing rule has made it virtually impossible for the actors and actresses to have sexual relations.

She added that some have suggested that they just engage in verbal sex, but many feel that it's just not the same.

A veteran actor, who specializes in “Gourmet Sex” films, said that viewers of porn want to see couples sweating, slipping, and oozing all kinds of unspeakable body fluids out of unmentionable body orifices, cavities, and muffinmeisters.

Hooha Katzenbaum, who is alleged to be President Trump’s favorite porn star, said that she does not have a degree, or even a sugar daddy that she can use to get her by for the time being.

She stated that she may have to end up getting a job as an entertainer in a senior citizens home.

Hooha noted that the monthly mortgage payment on her Beverly Hills home is $6,000.

Katzenbaum pointed out that, if she can not act in porn movies, she may have to end up moving to La Habra, La Brea, or maybe even Tijuana, Mexico.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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