Country Singer Blake Shelton Says That This Sheltering-in-Place Policy Has Quadrupled His Beer Consumption

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Tuesday, 21 April 2020

image for Country Singer Blake Shelton Says That This Sheltering-in-Place Policy Has Quadrupled His Beer Consumption
Blake playing his guitar on his Casa Red Ranch in Oklahoma.

TISHOMINGO, Oklahoma – The 43-year-old country music singer, Blake Shelton, says that he really misses performing before a live audience.

Shelton said that he and his girlfriend, Gwen Stefani, and a bunch of her kids, are sheltering-in-place at his Casa Red Ranch.

He commented that he had just about got caught up on his ranch chores such as mending fences, painting the chicken coop, and churning the butter.

Gwen reminded him that he also turned his horse, Bucko, into a gelding. Blake laughed and said that old Bucko, who is now old Buckalina, still hasn’t forgiven him for taking away his horsehood.

Blake remarked that after altering Bucko, he realized that he needed to back off a little from his beer-drinking. He went on to say that since he has been self-isolating, his brewski intake has soared to over 400%.

He said that, with all of their free time, he and Gwen are going to be working on that 30,000-piece puzzle of the Gulf of Mexico that he got for his birthday.

Blake has already written a song about the whole stay-at-home situation called, “We Got So Intimate During Our Sheltering-in-Place That We’re Now Fixin’ to Have Us a Sheltering-in-Place Baby.”

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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