Dolphin said that he won't be able to go swimming with Dave in Accounts

Written by Ben Macnair

Saturday, 2 November 2019

image for Dolphin said that he won't be able to go swimming with Dave in Accounts
Stan Bridgewater, dressed up for a night on the town.

Stanley Bridgewater, a six-year-old Bottlenosed Dolphin, is today distracted that he missed, for the seventh time in a matter of days, the chance to go swimming with Dave from Accounts.

Every Accounts department has a Dave, with a bad comb-over, internet dating profiles where he is holding pictures of a fish, and an old pair of Paisley slacks.

Stan told us 'I was just too far away from the shore again. Honestly, all of these swimmers think that I am going to go where they will be hanging out. If they want to be swimming with me, they have to come to where I am.'

Dave said 'Honestly, I don't care which dolphin I swim with, but I just want to swim with one, so I can put the picture up on Firestarter.com.'

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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