Taylor Swift & Latest Lover Split Up

Written by D P Whitehead

Wednesday, 28 October 2015

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Taylor swift has sensationally broken up with herself telling friends and family "That's it, we are done, it is over, we are never, EVER, getting back together!"

The break up has come as a surprise for many but for others it seems it is a regular occurrence for the 52-year-old singer.

Reports suggest that Swift called time on her relationship with herself after an incident involving a dirty coffee cup.,

She allegedly told friends, "I made myself a cup of coffee to drink in my room and after I drank it I left it on my bedside cabinet. Well, three days later it was still there! I hadn't even bothered to take it back downstairs to the kitchen, let alone rinse it and put it in the dishwasher. I simply can not put up with laziness and such inconsideration. This, of course, comes less than a week after I didn't put the toilet seat down after using the bathroom, don't I realize that there is not just me in this relationship?"

Swift sent a text message to herself informing her of the break-up.

"As of yet I haven't replied, so I guess I got the message," she chirped.

Swift refused to comment on this story, instead she told this writer, whom she has never met, that, "We are done. It's over. I am splitting up with you."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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