K-Fed Starts Auction of Britney Sex Tape

Funny story written by Felix Minderbinder

Sunday, 12 November 2006

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image for K-Fed Starts Auction of Britney Sex Tape
The only known photograph of the alleged tape

LOS ANGELES (AP) - Estranged hubby Kevin Federline has reportedly started an online auction of a videotape he took having sex with Britney Spears.

"I always knew that tape would prove useful and lucrative," K-Fed said. "That's why I shot it. I'm gonna make millions with it."

Britney Spears recently filed for divorce from Federline citing "irreconcilable differences," and Federline has filed for big bucks spousal support money from Spears as well as custody of their children.

Federline has already been offered millions for the four hour long sex tape supposedly filmed during the couple's honeymoon.

"This vid is dynamite," K-Fed added. "I've told Britney that she's gotta comply with my money demands otherwise the whole world will see her having sex which will be devastating."

The sex tape is expected to only toughen the rocky divorce case. Federline is a former backup dancer and failed aspiring rapper.

"God knows that this is my only chance to score big-time," he added. "I'm gonna be rolling in dough no matter what happens. That is, if I don't end up in jail for blackmail!"

"Kevin is prepared to go the distance in order to do what he feels is necessary to protect his bank account and he will not be intimidated or dissuaded from pursuit of those goals," said Michael Sandman, spokesman for Federline's attorney Marcus Vincentio Kaplanman.

Spears, 24, married Federline, 28, two years ago. They have a 1-year-old son Sean Preston and Jayden James born September 12.

Spears married K-Fed just eight months after ending a 55-hour Las Vegas marriage to her childhood sweetheart Jason Alexander.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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