Written by Auntie Jean

Saturday, 18 January 2014

image for "That's Magic" Paul Daniels' house not flooded
Levitation illusion (not Paul Daniels)

The Thames Riviera home of top Magic Circle magician and Illusionist Paul Daniels has not flooded like almost every other nearby property. Paul and Debbie told our reporter.

"The bureaucratic idiots will not give permission for me to pay for what I wanted in the line of flood defences so I have had to use a little "magic" of my own. It's no magic secret though really. I've just provided somewhere for the water to go instead of in my house. It goes into an empty pool and I have enough pumps to get rid of it.

It's soul destroying to have filthy water invade everywhere repeatedly and I have got the ingenuity to solve it unconventionally so I am doing just that. Instead of sitting back and whingeing I have got off my butt and sorted it."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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