Sources Confirm Katie Holmes Not "Hunting Foxxes" But "Picking Willows"

Funny story written by Tony Bagodonutz

Sunday, 20 October 2013

Insiders have revealed new developments in recent rumors surrounding Katie Holmes and her alleged romance with Actor Jamie Foxx.

Katie Holmes stated publicly this week that "Jamie and I are close. He is a wonderful confidant and we have become great friends. That is all we are however, friends."

Sources say that this is more than likely true, as recent developments have revealed that Holmes has been seen participating in public displays of affection with actor, Warwick Davis. Davis is most noted for his roles in the late 80's film, "Willow" and the lead character throughout the "Leprechaun" movies franchise.

"Yeah, I knew the Foxx rumor was probably bunk. It didn't fit. I'll tell you what fits though! Warwick "Willow" Davis would not be a stretch for Katie as far as personality, appearance, et cetera," explains Hollywood insider Yuri Dooche, "it's obviously a stretch for Warwick, or at least a step stool, but it was always that way for Tommy too."

This information was revealed after sources say that Katie broke off a brief fling with Jedi Master Yoda.

When asked about his thoughts on the new developments Yoda stated, "nothing to say have I. Man of action, not of words I am. Action there will be. Believe me! Ohhhh. Action there will be!"

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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