Honey Boo Boo Visits A Petting Zoo

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Monday, 25 March 2013

image for Honey Boo Boo Visits A Petting Zoo
Chucky The Chicken is one of the most popular residents at The Tarzan & Jane Petting Zoo. (Photo by Honey Boo Boo).

TARZANA - Alana Thompson better known as Honey Boo Boo star of the reality TV show, Here Comes Honey Boo Boo paid a visit to the world famous Tarzan & Jane Petting Zoo located in Tarzana, California.

Alana was accompanied by her mother "Mama" Shannon, who says she's lost 100 pounds by not really doing anything special.

Also along on the trip to the Left Coast from the family home in McIntyre, Georgia were Honey Boo Boo's three older sisters Chickadee, Chubbs, and Pumpkin.

Their father Mike "Sugar Bear" Thompson could not make the trip because he had some privacy fence mending to do.

But family relative Uncle Poodle, who stars in his own realty show titled The Gay Hillbillies of Georgia, did manage to fly out with the family.

He said that he didn't really have much to do back at his trailer which is located at The Cornbread & Grits Trailer Park in McIntyre.

The Thompson-Shannon clan was given a special tour of the petting zoo by zoo employee Bagby "Swizzle Stick" Wispingwind.

He made it a point to stress to Honey Boo Boo not to scare the animals by screaming at them because they could end up biting her.

The little, semi-sarcastic, pint-sized pageant princess replied, "Hell, dey best not be a-biting on me cause I sure nuff be a-biting back on dem."

Wispingwind just shook his head.

Honey Boo Boo quickly fell in love with Chucky The Chicken and she told her mom that she wanted to buy it and take it back to Georgia.

Her mama said that they already have a bunch of chickens plus the airlines would not allow a chicken to travel on the plane.

The little 7-year-old mini-celebrity yelled back, "Well I likes this here chicken cause I can tell dat it likes me and thinks I'm gosh darn pretty which I gosh darn am."

"Mama" Shannon told her to put Chucky down. Honey Boo Boo refused. So finally Mama had to wrestle her little sweety-pie to the ground and forcibly take a visibly shaken Chucky from the clutches of Honey Boo Boo's arms.

Security was immediately called and the entire family was escorted off the property and told that they were very lucky that they were not charged with disturbing the peace and endangering petting zoo animals.

SIDENOTE: Uncle Poodle told Wispingwind that he would like to buy Ramon The Neutered Rabbit for $200. He was told that none of the animals in the petting zoo were for sale at any price.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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