X-Factor: The Youngest Contestant Beatrice Miller, 13, Is Sent Home

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Saturday, 24 November 2012

image for X-Factor: The Youngest Contestant Beatrice Miller, 13, Is Sent Home
A lucky coin that Kanye West gave to Beatrice but which obviously did not work.

HOLLYWOOD - This week's Thanksgiving Holidays edition of X-Factor saw a double elimination.

The first to go home was 17-year-old Arin Ray, who realized that the judges were just not happy with his singing ability as evidenced by the fact that during his performance judge L.A. Reid was on his cell phone and Simon Cowell was texting his girlfriend Carmen Electra.

CeCe Frey, 21, and Beatrice Miller, 13, found themselves in the Bottom Two.

Frey is a good looking young lady that off-the-record Simon has said could become a fashion model.

CeCe sang first and it was evident that she was extremely nervous as she had pitch problems, volume problems, and eyeliner problems.

Then Beatrice took the stage and it was obvious that she was going to have an awfully difficult time. Demi Lovato turned to The Sultan of Sarcasm (Cowell) and said that she hopes she can remember the words to her song.

The Viceroy of Venom whispered that he hoped that she could remember the song that she was supposed to sing.

After she sang, Simon told her that at 13, he can clearly see that she is just way too young to be competing with the older boys and girls.

When the judges voted, the vote was 3 to 1 to send Beatrice back home to Maplewood, New Jersey. Only Britney Spears voted for her but rumor has it that the reason is because she is kind of jealous of the very good looking CeCe Frey.

Little Miller began crying hysterically. Co-host Khloe Kardashian hugged her and asked her if she was okay, Beatrice replied, "Are you friggin kiddin' me Kardashian? I have just had three of the judges kick me back to New Jersey, I'm crying like a water faucet and you ask me if I'm okay."

"Never mind then." Khloe shot back. "Forget I asked. Geez."

Beatrice then began weeping some more and uttered some words that luckily the microphone did not catch. She was quickly led by two security guards to a contestants dressing room backstage.

A full 20 minutes after the show ended, Beatrice was still crying. Co-host Mario Lopez suggested that one of the X-Factor assistants turn on the television in her dressing room and turn it to The Bill O'Reilly Show.

Bingo! Beatrice fell asleep within 45 seconds.

SIDENOTE: The word on the street is that Beatrice's two mothers are seriously thinking about hiring Ginger Allred, and filing a lawsuit against Simon Cowell on grounds of Swayando Los Jueces, which is a Latin term that means Swaying The Judges.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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