Jennifer Lopez Says She Does Not Like The Term "Cougar" And That She Prefers The Term "Older Woman"

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Tuesday, 31 January 2012

image for Jennifer Lopez Says She Does Not Like The Term "Cougar" And That She Prefers The Term "Older Woman"
Jennifer Lopez shown relaxing in her luxury suite at The Olé Toro Resort Hotel In Cancun, Mexico. (Photo by Rico Chorizo).

CANCUN, Mexico - American Idol judge Jennifer Lopez and her new love interest Caspar Smart were down in sunny Mexico frolicking flirtatiously on the beach as they enjoyed their stay at The Olé Toro Resort Hotel.

J.Lo whose personality has become extremely bubblier since she filed for divorce from her husband Marc Anthony, looked positively stunning in a mini pink bikini swimsuit that looked like it could easily fit in a coffee cup.

Needless to say J.Lo's boy toy, Caspar Smart, who at 24, is 18 years younger than Mrs. Lopez had a grin on his face that three welders with industrial sized Brillo pads could not have removed.

He was wearing a pair of swim trunks with the New York Giants logo on the front and the New York Yankees logo on the back.

Casparito, as Jennifer calls him, was also wearing a Come On Down To Louisiana T-shirt which had recently been given to him by stand up comedian Zydeco Dupree who first met J.Lo. at The 1999 Lake Charles Cajun-Creole Crayfish Cook Off & Concert where they both performed.

Lopez and Smart were soon met for lunch by one of Mexico's leading entertainment journalists Laguna Vendetta with Las Maracas News Agency.

Miss V asked the happy couple how they were enjoying their trip to Cancun. J.Lo replied that it was terrific and that she had been here once before in 2007, but that she and Marc (Anthony) had to leave early due to Hurricane LaQuanda which hit the city destroying two tequila factories, three piñata plants, the bullring, and a ten-foot bronze statue of Eva Longoria.

Lopez was then asked how she felt about having been named 2011's "Cougar of The Year."

J.Lo smiled politely as she took a bite out of one of her Super Nachos. Caspar simply looked away towards a nearby tamales tray. Jennifer then told Miss V that she really does not care for the term Cougar.

She added that when she thinks of the word, she immediately gets these connotations of an older woman on the prowl for a younger man.

Miss V did not touch that line. J.Lo then stated that she has always hated the word Cougar ever since she first saw it in print in an article about her that had been written by Margarita Mixx in The Tinsel Town Times Tribune.

Vendetta softly and carefully asked Mrs. Lopez what she preferred to be called in lieu of the the "C" word.

Jennifer dabbed at her long flowing expanse of dark hair. She took a big drink of her Corona Light Beer, and replied that she prefers the term Older Woman.

"Well alrighty then," Miss Vendetta replied, Older Woman it is."

In a non-related story. GOP maven Ann Coulter is denying the rumor, that reportedly was started by Nancy Pelosi, that she is moving to Afghanistan due to health reasons.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more