London - (Royal Ass Mess): Royal bankers Cunts & Co are to be declared bankrupt and all Puppet Monarchy accounts ditched as toxic waste following the collapse of parent company Royal Bank of Snotland (RBS).
RBS took over the ailing royal bank in 1999 when it was a fledgeling Al Qaeda arms smuggling subsidiary of the National Westmonster Bank.
A post-9/11 Treasury probe then revealed the majority of House of Windsor accounts consisted of nothing more that dodgy Enron-backed IOUs.
Attempts to securitise the debts to quasi-royal City bankers Whore & Co were initially successful following the generous intervention of New York Ponzi scam trader Bernie Madoff.
The total Puppet Monarchy debt portfolio now stands at £37 billion.
