The Auntie Anne Pretzel Company in a Budget Tightening Move Says They Are Cutting Back on Salt Grains

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Friday, 13 November 2020

image for The Auntie Anne Pretzel Company in a Budget Tightening Move Says They Are Cutting Back on Salt Grains
The new company policy calls for 7 less grains of salt per pretzel.

LANCASTER, Pennsylvania – (Satire News) – ABC News and CNN have both recently reported that the pretzel business is booming.

Sales of the salt-covered pastry have already surpassed the national sales of Fried Spinach, Emu-Meat Hot Dogs, and Enchiladas-on-a-Stick.

Executives with Auntie Anne have announced that, in a budget-tightening move, they have decided to cut back 7 grains of salt on each pretzel.

They estimate that this little move, alone, will mean a net saving of $3.9 million per year.

Auntie Anne has divulged that they have perfected a much healthier grain of salt, which actually has 81% less sodium.

Auntie Anne's is thrilled to announce that they have just signed a $6.4 million contract with the Dallas Cowboys.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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